kids buy the darndest things

some of my favorite things is the crap they market at kids. cuz you can pretty much sell anything to anyone. but marketers just let loose with the stuff they get up to when it comes to the wee ones. and the ads generally don't disappoint either.

you've got dolls that pee, dolls with dogs that poop, bendy wax-covered string, booger candy, candy that comes out of a candy toilet, yogurt that turns your poop turquoise, animals that poop jellybeans (well, i'll admit, i bought that one for me), but you get my point...

and the commercials for these items are always flashy and seduce kids into thinking their lives would be amazing if they bought any one (or all) of these items.

except for one campaign that had the direct opposite effect. it was a few years back. there was an ad for juice on the boob tuve. the juice itself was normal enough, or so i imagine. but the mascot was a giant talking apple-grape. with a face. it looked like a giant talking hemorrhoid. so, the ad had the effect of, "hey, kids! how's about a nice heaping tall glass of delicious hemorrhoid juice?"

way to put a kid off of a fruity and refreshing beverage. well, maybe my kid was too young to know what a hemorrhoid was at the time, but i know that i couldn't in good conscience feed her butt-juice. so, alas, we'll never know if it really was made from the best stuff on earth.